nutella

i ate half a pint of nutella when i got home tonight. the world should know. know this, world : Katherine Morgan Chadwick ate HALF A PINT (or whatever the metric measurement is for a tub of nutella) tonight. When she came home. This is what she ate. There it is. 

Goodnight. 

Williamsburg walkin'

The other day, my neighbor/friend Bryce and I walked all around our lovely neighborhood. There's so much to see over here. There's so many stores, so many streets... I just took a few pictures.

surf shop, lunch at jimmy's diner on Union, a bakery.... I wish I never had to leave the hood.

Joey

(deep sigh)
For those of you that know me well, you know that it goes without saying, there has been a certain man in my life for the past seven plus years..
We met in history class our Junior year of college. His first year at Fordham. A trans-fuh.  European history? Who can remember. Anyways, I thought he was super cute. And while he'll be the first to deny this, he had the prettiest frosted tips a boy could have. Anyways, then he opened his mouth.  And while I knew at that moment we would never end up in bed together, we just may end up being best friends.
And we did.
The years here in New York would never have been the same without Joey. He's made me laugh when I thought laughter didn't exist anymore. He's lifted me up. He's dusted me off. We've shared momentous theatre experiences, wonderful dinners, laughter, tears, and as always, many a fishbowl of wine. Thank you Pomodoro.
But most of all, we've shared the most amazing friendship. A friendship that has already withstood the test of time, but also my life away in Vegas, on tour, and beyond..
This boy is my life. He is my New York pulse. He is the best thing that's happened to me over here. I'd take Joey over sliced bread any old day... and I love bread!

And so, one week from today, Joey will depart this New York roller coaster for the next adventure. He's heading back to his roots. Back to California to find out what else he can shake up in life.
While I can only imagine how dreadfully boring it will be here without him, I know this is just a temporary displacement.  And he's gonna do great things. Wherever he is.

Besides, real friends never leave. They're always there beside you. And I know Joey and I will pick up right back where we started from...where bowers of flowers bloom in the sun. Each morning, at dawning, birdies sing and everything.. a sun-kissed mist so don't be late. That's why I can hardly wait. Open up your Golden Gate, California here he comes..
love you.

it's in the air

The winds blew fast and strong;
she didn't have much time.
The wait was less than long,
but longer'd be a crime.

The winds came hard and fast;
they whispered what to do.
"Entrust yourself to us,"
"and we'll entrust to you."

As city buildings wept;
and dust flew in her eyes,
she thought of all she'd promised,
the familiar lullabies.

And with a whip of wind;
the decision could not fade,
she'd look for western skies
where greener pastures could be made.

Breezy, balmy, sweaty, lush green eyes. That’s what I’m sitting next to right now.. In rural Massachusetts, on a well-manicured porch, of a cookie-cutter hotel. We drink coffee that tastes bitter, but it’s good because we paid for it. Well, he paid for it. But I’ll pay for it. Eventually…

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY...

One of the things I miss about California :
This is my godmother, Jane. She's not my godmother by birth terms, or anything like that. I deemed her and her husband, Randy, my godparents, probably like seven years ago. They're my fam.

Let me tell you about this woman. She's one of the greatest people in the world. She can host a party of twenty plus people in her house while standing over her stove cooking spaghetti, with a vodka tonic in one hand, slotted spoon in the other, and a cigarette dangling out of her lips. "Katie, come in here and eat some of this!" she yells with her raspy Elaine Stritch meets Kate Hepburn voice. Of course to me, it just sounds like heaven.
Over a year ago, Jane lost her husband, Randy. Life, of course, has not been the same without this beautiful man. He had a heart of gold, and a love for his 'Janie' that burned brighter than the furthest star. He was, without a doubt, and will always be, her soul mate. But it hasn't been easy. And I just wish so much that I could be closer to her because I really love her.
I LOVE YOU JANE!

young brooklyn love

Last night, while walking to my gym over in Ft. Greene, I had the privilege of witnessing this:

gaggle of fourteen year olds standing on the corner, huddled in a circle, the whole gang'
buzzing, excitement, squeals, eyes scrunching in embarrassment..
BIG KID: "Do you love her, do you?"
scrawny kid: "I don't know, yeah, I think I do. I love her.."
BIG KID: "WHAT THE FUCK MAN, YOU'VE ONLY KNOWN HER FOR A WEEK!"
scrawny kid: "I know, I don't know what's happening..."

my weekend in Providence

This past weekend, Natasha and I hopped on the Mega Bus up to New England. First stop, Providence, to see Tony in "The Lion King"...

Natasha (left) and myself, assuming the position of real Lion Kings

                          

Tony, post amazing performance, and still looking dap dap dapper.

In NYC, we don't get to experience that wonderful suburban architecture, that is, THE MALL.  So we ventured forth to the Providence version, where at one particular kiosk, they were selling hand painted hermit crabs. So, I mean, you could take home a hermit crab with the Batman emblem on his shell.... totally normal.

     On Saturday we headed to Boston to visit Natasha's brother, Dylan. We traveled via the commuter rail. I took some of these photos you are seeing with my new Hipstamatic app. Me likey.

Massachusetts out the window....or Rhode Island.

Here is the wonderful Dylan, with his baby kitty Gina...or as Natasha says "Geeeeeeeeeeena"

Natasha wanted to laugh in the snow. So she did.

On the way back from Boston yesterday, I got to take some great pictures out the window. I have a thing for Sunday evening cold winter sunsets...

and the light...

it set my hair on fire.

All in all, we had a really great weekend. As per usual, I may have had too much to drink. And probably smoked too many cigarettes, but that happens from time to time.
On a personal note, being in Providence was sort of haunting. For me, that city represents the beginning of a very certain time in my life. It was a transitional time where I also fell in love with someone. And then that journey began and ended.
Places, cities, they all change. And we leave them, and we come back. And sometimes, we're surprised by what a bar in a hotel can make you remember. Memories that you thought you had forgotten about, they are still there. Sometimes we just have to shake the dust off, and go back.

the fox and the killer whale

Last night I had one of those dreams. The kind that you actually remember the next morning. Although, I knew I wanted to share it, and so I took the time to jot it down. Based on my notes, and my memory, this is what happened:
The setting: my house in California. For those of you who haven't seen it, its quite picturesque. Although kind of messy. But that's not the point. The view is all mountains, and sky, and a bright little sliver of Pacific Ocean on the horizon. In the dream, however, ocean surrounded the two story home. Grey skies and terrible creatures were lurking in the waters below.
I've had a fear of killer whales for so long, I can't remember. I've had dreams before where I'm in a dark tank, and two or more swim below me. They never hurt me, but if one grazes my foot, I swear to God I'll die right there. Anyways, back to the dream I'm currently addressing. So in the water, I see big sharks. And I see a shark eat a huge fish, and then this gigantic killer whale comes up from behind the humongous shark and devours him whole. So I'm running from room to room, trying to see what I can see from the second floor windows. And then I see him. Down below on the embankment above the water. This little fox. He's the most beautiful little thing you've ever seen. And so I must tell you where he came from. We'll get back to the dream again, I promise you.
When I was eight or nine, maybe eleven, my mom and I went for an evening walk to go pick up our mail on the main road.  This was one of my favorite evening/after school activities. The evening has always been my most favorite time of day. Especially where I grew up. Pastel sunsets, warm breezes, and always, as my dad can remember, "the night sounds".... anyways. We were walking up Resmar Road, and there, perched on a stone wall, looking more stoic than a king, was a baby fox. A kit. He was the same color of my hair, with this patch of white on his ruffled chest. He saw me, and he looked in my eyes, and he sort of smiled. This really happened. Pretty much.
So, in the dream, he was running back and forth on the wall that separated my house from the waves that were beating against it. And the killer whale was watching him closely.
My mom said something like "Katie, don't watch."
But I couldn't help myself. I saw the killer whale, the one that had eaten the shark, floating beside the left wall. I saw him waiting for the fox. I saw the fox teasing him and taunting him. I didn't think what would happen next would happen. But the fox started running towards the whale. He was running so fast, lighting speed. This little blip of red amongst the grey blue darkness surrounding him.  He leaped, and in slow motion, (yeah, my dreams can do slow motion), he leaped into the air, and the killer whale grabbed the little kit by it's head, and shook him so hard. I saw his little red body being whipped around. Side to side, up and down. His small arms and legs lying dead at his sides. And then finally, the whale dropped his head back, and let the baby fox fall right down his throat. (dream ends)
I woke up this morning, and I felt so bad. I don't know where it all came from, or what any of it means.

A dear college friend of mine has always referred to me as her kit. Her baby fox. And I just hope, I really hope I don't jump into the whale's mouth. Because it looked painful. And shocking. And it was all over just so fast.

green hat

culprit.

bees.

To bee or not to bee… over the past few years, I’ve discovered a newly strange, wonderful fascination with bees. Honey bees. Honey. I love them. I love what they do. What they accomplish. They work so hard. They’re so passionate without trying to be. They create, and pollinate, and deliver, and re-boot. And they know not why? Or do they? I want to function like a bee. A beautiful bee. A bee that could give you honey, and sting you. But you know, once they sting you, they die. The ultimate sacrifice, right? They will sting you, and they will die, because they gave you part of their body. That little, delicate, tiny, sweet little bee body. They hurt you, but they paid the ultimate price for doing so.

Be careful with your body, with your sting, with your sacrificial moments. Choose wisely, like a bee.

Of course, a bee is not a human being. And therefore, my analogy sort of sucks.

today

So, this is my first entry. A little late to the world of blogging, I'm well aware. This was sort of my last resort today.
I'm a 27 year old actor. I live in Brooklyn. I'm trying to keep up with this lifestyle. I was on tour for a year and a half. With a big ol gay musical. I've been off tour since this past June. But shit, I've had a real hard time hopping back on the train here.
As any actor knows, it's easy to become sick of the daily grind. The me, the how to get myself out there, the how to get them to notice ME!!!!!!! its a selfish trip. And not to say it can't be worth the while at some point. But today, it just simply is not enough. For me.

I started crying to my upstairs neighbor this afternoon. He recently had his apartment broken in to, and brought over some device so that poor, desperate people can't break into ours.
I stood in the door, with my wine in hand, and the tears they came down fast. How fucking embarrassing. I mean, get it together, kate.
anyways. after watching 'Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN'...here I am.
Stay with me. See how this goes. I'm a better writer than this. Just let me slob it out for today. and maybe tomorrow...
k